Fertility & IVF
IVF, IUI, fertility treatments, and conception journeys.
What I wish someone had told me before starting fertility treatments
There are things you learn during fertility treatments that no one really prepares you for. The practical stuff — bruises from injections, the early morning monitoring appointments, the emotional whiplash of each cycle. But also the bigger picture stuff: that it might take multiple cycles, that "unexplained infertility" is a real and frustrating diagnosis, that your relationships might shift, and that it's okay to take breaks. One thing many people say helped: finding a community of people who get it. Not to compare numbers, but to feel less alone in the process. If you could go back and tell yourself one thing before starting this journey, what would it be?
AMH, FSH, AFC — understanding your fertility numbers
When you start fertility testing, you'll encounter a lot of acronyms. Here's a quick guide to the key ones. AMH (Anti-Müllerian Hormone) reflects your ovarian reserve — how many eggs you have remaining. Higher is generally better, but it doesn't tell you about egg quality. FSH (Follicle-Stimulating Hormone) on day 3 of your cycle is another reserve marker — higher FSH can indicate diminished reserve. AFC (Antral Follicle Count) is the number of small follicles visible on ultrasound at the start of a cycle. These numbers give a picture of quantity, not quality. Age remains the strongest predictor of egg quality. And importantly, these are snapshots — they can vary cycle to cycle. Have your numbers surprised you? How did your provider explain them?
IVF protocol basics — what to expect at each stage
If you're starting IVF, the process can feel overwhelming. Here's a simplified overview of what a typical cycle looks like. First comes ovarian stimulation (8-14 days of injectable medications to grow multiple follicles). You'll have regular monitoring appointments with bloodwork and ultrasounds. Then there's the trigger shot, followed by egg retrieval (a short procedure under sedation). After retrieval, your eggs are fertilized (conventional IVF or ICSI), and embryos develop for 3-5 days. Many clinics now recommend genetic testing (PGT-A) before transfer. The embryo transfer itself is usually quick and painless, followed by the infamous "two-week wait" before your pregnancy test. Every clinic has slightly different protocols, so your experience may vary. What stage are you at, or what questions do you have about the process?
The emotional toll of fertility treatments — you're not alone
Fertility treatment is one of those experiences that's incredibly isolating even though millions of people go through it. The hormones, the waiting, the hope and disappointment on repeat — it takes a toll that's hard to describe to anyone who hasn't been there. The financial pressure adds another dimension. Insurance coverage varies wildly, and the costs can feel crushing. And then there's the well-meaning but painful "just relax and it'll happen" advice from people who don't understand. If you're in the middle of this right now, I want you to know that your feelings — whatever they are — are valid. Grief, anger, hope, numbness, all of it. What's been the hardest part of your fertility journey, and what's helped you cope?